Of things that can go wrong, and does

Today was not a good day for me. It started bad, salvaged somewhat, and ended bad. Was initially disinclined to blog about it, but somehow, I do not want to let it fester within me, and make me continue to be unhappy. I hope writing it down will somehow lessen my negative feelings contained within me, so that I can achieve a calmer self.

I had a cup of coffee late last night, and sort of wanted to test whether my system could sustain the intake, and sleep immediately. But no, what I could have done previously, I can’t do anymore. A cup of coffee before sleeping does keep me awake at night.

So, it began with me catching only about four hours sleep at best, and left for work 15 minutes later than normal. Of course, traffic would be heavier, and the federal highway is well known for its congestion. At least the traffic was moving, although at a “move, stop, move, stop” kind of rhythm at certain stretches. And would you know it? At one of the “stop”s, a lorry had to hit my car from the back. Don’t really want to go into anymore details, but luckily, my car doesn’t look damage, but the boot cannot open. The spare wheel at the back of my car sort of absorbed the impact and protected the back lights and stuff from being damaged. There is a dent though from the spare wheel being forcibly knocked, and somehow must have jammed the clasp to open the car boot. But thank goodness, no serious damage to persons.

At this point, I was troubled. What a rotten way to start the day, and I had to calm myself down. Seriously, it was an accident, and definitely not intentionally. As a good friend put it, somehow, no matter how careful you drive, other people’s recklessness or carelessness somehow will also affect you.

It was a busy day at work, with many reports due and various interruptions to solve ad hoc issues. Lunch break was shortened due to meetings (although I still took slightly more than the normal 1 hour timeframe), and yes, I did bitch about the accident to my colleagues, but I wasn’t angry. Just have to deal with it, get it fixed, and move on.

The day progressed, my mood got better. Actually, I was scheduled to go to 1U after work to meet a friend for dinner and then catch a movie “Curse of the Golden Flower”. I was initially surprised that my friend was willing to watch the show after hearing negative reviews of the show, but he did say he was bringing a female friend along. And sometime during the day, somehow, hints emerged that he purposely wanted to introduce me to this girl. Ok, I am game. His intentions were to nobly suffer through the movie not of his choice so that me, as his good friend, may get to know his other friend, with hope that we would click. Now, I have nothing against this, as my intention was just to have a good time.

So, just as I was about to leave the office at 5:20pm to meet my friend as scheduled at 6:30pm at 1U, my boss’s secretary who was compiling the reports, asked me “where is agenda 8?” which was a proposal I helped my lady boss do, and was like due the day before. Damn! Have to hunt the paper to see which boss hasn’t signed, and lo and behold, it was in the big boss’s room right in front of his desk, but he had other things stacked on top that he didn’t notice it until I asked. BUGGER!!!

Calm down, there’s still time! Was planning to go via Penchala Link from Jalan Ampang, and tried a route which was supposedly shorter, but alas, I missed a turning, and had to do a major, and I mean MAJOR detour. SHIT! Couldn’t it get any worse? And in situations like these, yes, it does. One thing my friends know about me is that I am very particular about time keeping, and I detest being late, and don’t like others being late too, but have somewhat softened my stance on this. Hey! Things out of our control can happen, so some understanding goes a long way.

But wait a minute, my hp rang when I was unsettled and unsure of directions, and the first thing I heard was, “Where are you? Why are you not in the office?”. SHIT! Work related call from a banker asking about something, but nothing major. OK. That didn’t set me off, just unsettled me a bit more, wondering where the unfamiliar highway was leading me, but later more or less found myself heading in the correct direction.

Later, about 10 minutes before 6:30pm, my friend called me asking me where I was. “Nearly there, nearly there!”, as I was just approaching 1U. He doubted my ability to get there by 6:30pm and wanted to change our meeting venue to the dinner place which I had no clue where. I asked him to wait a bit as I had no clue where the eatery was in 1U, but he initially refused as he promised to meet his friend shortly after 6:30pm and wanted to keep that appointment. I got a bit pissed and my tone of voice must have conveyed my sentiments.

Yes, I was probably going to be late, and will be later still having to search for this elusive dinner place, but it dawned on my friend that I may just not turn up, and ruin his matchmaking plans. So he waited, and yes, with my mood, I did contemplate just driving home or go somewhere else entirely. At the end, I was one miserable minute late.

So, on we went for dinner, and his friend only turned up about 5 to 10 minutes after we sat down. Truth be told, I enjoyed the dinner. Had good conversation, and the girl was friendly, easy to talk to, etc.

Later, the three of us went for movie, and he intentionally make the girl sit between us, which was fine by me. For the movie, after hearing a lot of negative news about it, I was pleasantly surprised that I enjoyed it. What spoilt it for me a bit was someone else sitting close by who talked a bit here and there during the show which was very disruptive. Even at the end of the movie, as we were walking about, I heard comments like “that was the stupidiest show”. I couldn’t disagree more, but that’s neither here nor there, suffice to say that amidst all the grandeur and opulence, all is not well. Yet, at the core, love is what sustains and love is what will forgive the mistakes, but beware to those that are not loved. I think a lot of people miss this message, and see the film superficially amidst all the jiggling boobs and what nots.

However, the worse feeling I had was when we were leaving. I would have thought my friend knew me well enough that I do not like to be pressured to do things. All in my own time, yet, creating opportunities for me to be alone with his friend at this very first meeting, to me, is not on. Suggesting outright that I walk his friend back to her car alone may not sound strange to him, but certainly does to me, and created an uncomfortable situation. I suggested going together. The worse thing was, the girl was smart, and I think knew what my friend was trying to do, and decided to just leave on her own. I felt absolutely terrible, and tried to tell my friend, but he just walked off. Talk about like talking on the phone to someone, and that someone slams down the phone on you. It is literally akin to that, and no, I was definitely not pleased. What a way to spoil what could have been a very good ending to an evening.

Sometimes, I just wonder:
1. Did my friend inform the girl that he was trying to match make her?
2. Did my friend take into account our feelings into all these?
3. How would you feel if you were the girl, and meeting someone for the first time, and your mutual friend asked “that stranger” to walk you back to you car?

Yes, I applaud my friend for taking the initiative to try to “set us up”, but how blatant can it be? Maybe I go by different rules, but no, I do not appreciate such awkward circumstances.

After all these times, my close friends should know me better than this, and that I do not appreciate being put into “difficult” circumstances, and no, I do not like to be “forced” to do things. The more it is being forced, the more my nature rebels against it, and the more I don’t want to do it.

And yes, there was another time when THREE of my friends ganged up on me to “force’ me to do something with ever so flowery words, and as though I was dim witted to be unaware of what they were trying to do. In that instance, I relented but was literally seething inside. I have mentioned this before, but the message does not seem to be digested by my friends. Either that, or it had been literally digested and gone out their nether regions as unimportant. After all, they are doing what they think best for me, without considering my feelings into the equation. Sigh…

Here I am, trying to calm my troubled self as I write this, and am sort of glad the day is almost over. Let tomorrow be another day, and I am not here to hold grudges. I am also not looking for an apology from my friend as I understand his motive, but hope he apologises to the girl he put into such an uncomfortable circumstance. She didn’t deserve such treatment. Not that I do, mind you, but am still trying to learn to be more forgiving.